Mayflies

It's the season of the mayfly in Monroe. Mayflies live near water - they are aquatic insects. Monroe is on Lake Erie.

Two nights ago my son Josh and some of his friends went camping at Sterling State Park. On the shores of Lake Erie. That night the mayflies hatched. Billions of them. Josh described the mayfly invasion as one of biblical (Exodus-like) proportions. Mayflies descended upon them like the plague. One of Josh's friends resorted to punching them with his fists. One good strike on a mayfly's jaw and the thing is down for the count. Unfortunately, the deceased mayfly has a few million siblings, and you've just killed their brother.

The lifespan of a mayfly varies from 30 minutes to one day. People who hate mayflies can take some comfort from this, knowing that the mayfly that now irritates them will soon be lying in a coffin, mourned by its one billion dying siblings. "The primary function of the adult is reproduction; the mouthparts are vestigial, and the digestive system is filled with air." (See here, if you want to study mayflies.)

If, during the Great Mayfly Hatch Moses-esque Plague, you drive at night in downtown Monroe or, worse yet, in Luna Pier, the mayflies are as thick as snow. People literally shovel them off the sidewalks. Some years ago, feeling bored on a summer night, I asked Linda, "Want to go downtown and watch the mayflies?" She said, "No."

If you were a bug and had 30 minutes to live what would you do? Mayflies flock to gas station windows and stare inside. That's their life. Some escape from the outside to inside the gas station, where they get up close and personal with the lights. For these mayflies, this defines "freedom." Others prefer watching videos as they cling to Blockbuster's windows. This is their life. Their entire life. Franz Kafka would love it.

In Kafka's The Metamorphosis Gregor Samsa wakes up one morning to find out that he has morphed into a big bug. His parents freak out. Gregor's presence inspires disgust and fear. Gregor is confined to his room and eventually dies there. If you are an insect you do not fit in.

Some people's lives are, by their own choosing, the social equivalent of an insect's. Brief. Asocial. Irrelevant. Primary function: reproduction.