Monday, February 11, 2019

Seven Signs of Emotional Adultery

Holland State Park

Adultery is broader than having sex with someone other than your spouse. There is emotional adultery. This is infidelity to your spouse by sharing your heart with another person.

Here are seven signs that a married person is committing emotional adultery:

1.      You spend a lot of emotional energy on the person. You end up sharing stuff that you don’t even share with your partner -- hopes and dreams, things that would actually connect you to your partner.


2.      You dress up for that person.


3.      You make a point to find ways to spend time together, and that time becomes very important to you.


4.      You’d feel guilty if your partner saw you together; you are doing things and saying things that you would never do or say in front of your spouse.


5.      You share your feelings of marital dissatisfaction.


6.      You’re keeping secret the amount of time you’re spending with the person (including emailing, calling, texting).


7.      You start to feel dependent on the emotional high that comes with the relationship.

(From "Emotional Affair: Is It Cheating?")


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My two books are:

Leading the Presence-Driven Church

Praying: Reflections on 40 Years of Solitary Conversations with God.

I'm now working on...

Transformation: How God Changes the Human Heart 

Technology and Spiritual Formation

I am editing a book of essays on the Holy Spirit, authored by my HSRM colleagues. Hopefully this book will be out by the end of May.

And, when all this settles, Linda and I intend on writing our book on Relationships.