I'm preaching this morning at Redeemer on "Breaking the Chains of Shame."
Here are two excellent resources.
For more on freedom from shame see Lewis
Smedes's excellent Shame and Grace:
Healing the Shame We Don't Deserve. This is one of the best books I have
Check out Curt Thompson, The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves.
Take every thought captive. 2 Cor. 10:5 - We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
For help on how to do this, see Francis Frangipane, The Three Battlegrounds.
The opposite of "shame" is "acceptable." See the best book on "grace" -s Philip Yancey's What's So Amazing About Grace?