Tuesday, February 21, 2023

The Cure for Entitlement and Victimization


Sleeping Bear Dunes, Michigan

I recommend John Townsend's book The Entitlement Cure: Finding Success in Doing Hard Things the Right Way.

One of the bitter fruits of entitlement is externalization. Townsend writes: "People with an attitude of entitlement often project the responsibility of their choices on the outside, not the inside. The fault lies with other people, circumstances, or events. They blame others for every problem." (p. 61)

The worship songs of externalization are...

"It's Them, It's Them, It's Them, O Lord, Standin' in the Need of Prayer," and...

"Change Their Hearts, O God." 

Externalization-people fail to look at their part in their problems. "Instead, they default to answers outside their skin. The result? They tend to be powerless and unhappy. They tend to see life through the eyes of a victim. And their suffering is unproductive — it doesn’t get them anywhere." (Ib.)

The classic victim mentality is:

"Yes, I did what was wrong. But you forced me to do it." The "victim" persists in recruiting other people for the self-justification of evil. In this they destroy others, along with own soul.

Entitled people rarely say "thank you." Because they are deserving. Instead, they blame

"Blame," writes Townsend, "is a first cousin to entitlement." 
The constant blamer is the perpetual victim. 

The antidote to this bondage is to take responsibility for your own choices and attitudes. Be open to seeing yourself as the problem. Reject a global victimization that views yourself as someone who is always being "done to," and own your own part in your problems. 

Forgive those who have trespassed on your heart. 

Take responsibility for your own trespassing.